A Happy Mother's Day to Lisa Marie Rohde!!!!!

Don't even think about arguing with me. I have the greatest mom in the world. If you try to comment with some blasphemous musing about your own mom being the greatest I probably won't publish it. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for people disagreeing with me in life. I consider myself to be wrong at least 82% of the time (that statistic is from my informal study). However, when it comes to my mom I'm right, and I won't let my blog become a place for other people to claim motherly superiority.

To my mom:

You are the greatest mother for which I could ever hope

You always taught me right from wrong and to stay away from dope

Sometimes you spanked when I was bad and I didn't like that belt

You know, the one you hit me with that sometimes left a welt

But even though it caused me pain I know your love was true

Cuz every time you did it you'd say, "This hurts me more than you."

But that's enough about the whippings because they were pretty rare

(After all JOEL was the troubled one -- sometimes you even pulled his hair!)

Thank you for always coming to all of the sporting events I had

You came and cheered regardless if I played good or bad

You kept score at my baseball games and bought me food in-between

You sewed up holes in all my clothes and washed grass stains from my jeans

You brought snacks in elementary school, and came whenever there was a field trip

All the kids thought you were cool, so by association I was hip

You made sure that I always went to church on Sunday morning

We both liked when Pastor Dan was preaching, cuz he was never boring

And now you're a mother to lots more boys, and a girl thrown in to boot

I wonder if you do it just because they're all real cute

I wish that you and I lived closer to one another

It's very hard for me to be so far from my mother

I miss you very much, and I love you lots and lots too

Sometimes I think about you when I'm feeling kinda blue

I hope you have a very very happy Mother's Day

And when it's done I hope you don't up and run away!

Love you mom!